Friday, September 25, 2009

and we're off...

Life has become a race. I feel like I am running, running, running... The days are flying by. I blink and a week has passed. Crazy!!

Kendall has started school since my last post. She is doing well and enjoys it. Both Kendall and Brooklynn have made a number of friends at school. It is still weird to think that I have children in school. How did this happen? Speaking of crazy things... I turned 30 this last week. How did THAT happen? I just don't know where the time has gone!

I started work this last month at Starbucks. I managed a few store in the Springs in my pre-baby years, but have't worked in 5 years. So, I started a few weeks ago. It's been going pretty well. I really enjoy working and love it when I am there, but then when I come home I am having a hard time. Does this happen with every working mom or just because I'm new at this? The roles in our home have completely changed. Jay is staying home with the kids... being mister mom and he is doing an amazing job. I am so proud of him, but at he same time I miss being the "mom". My kids come to me and say "daddy, oh I mean mommy..." and it makes me sad that they now think of him first when they need something. I feel bad that this this how I feel, but I can't help it. I am used to being the one that everyone needs something from. It used to annoy me, but now I long for that.

Funny how I can never be content with what I have at that time!!

I know this is just a season of life.

I know I will be back at home with my kids in time.

I know this is where the Lord has led us and I know that Jay worked a job he hated for a couple years because he needed to support us.

I at least really enjoy my job!!

I guess this is part of being an adult!!

Kind of stinks.

Jay started school. He is going full-time on line. It seems like there is something always going on here. I am rushing out the door to work, he is leaving to go somewhere to study in quiet, he is leaving for something at church he is in charge of, Brooklynn and Kendall need dropped off or picked up from school (two different locations) and we are trying to keep a little normal life around here for the kids. Oh, and we (or I should say Jay) is still working on the floors, so that is a constant burden hanging over our heads. I guess it's just a little overwhelming right now. Again, just need to remind myself that this is a season of life... this too will pass. We are figuring it all out and I know once we figure our new routines it will be a little easier.

Anyway, this is my quick little update and gripe session!!

3 comments:

Little S said...

Wow! I'm tired just reading this post. I'll be praying for you guys!!

hawesfamily said...

i have a hard time coming home from work as well to 2 whinny children from being at daycare all day who are exhausted and all i want to do is relax as well...so it's not just you it's just a working mom thing...sorry to tell you it might not get easier...at least in 4 years it hasn't for me:( and i only have 2 kids..you have 4!!! it was hard for me though too when Jaimee was watching them cuz kaiden would be like jaimee, grandma, i mean mommy...BUT what i had to remember is i knew they were being taken care of very well by someone we trust and know who will love our kids...so the thing to be definitely to be glad about is jarod taking care of them:) and not some strangers:) but i'll keep praying for you guys with this time of change!!! I am glad you like your job too..i wish i liked mine as well!

Anonymous said...

It's difficult for sure! And it's hard sometimes not to feel resentful toward the person who gets to be the stay-at-home parent to your children while you're putting in hours at a job. I went through that as well after 12-weeks of maternity leave, then having to go back to work while hubby got to stay home with the baby. Once I finally recognized I was feeling resentful (that truly was the word for it!) - I was able to pray for peace for myself and strength for my hubby. The Lord answered my prayers. I hope he answers yours as well. Remember, it's the plan He has for your life. Hugs!

Rebecca (Fischer) Bearson